• Jessica Berg

He Soiled His What … ?


Let me introduce you to my husband, Chad.  He’s handsome, kind, charming (when he wants to be), and he’s funny.  Oh yeah, I almost forgot … he LOVES to argue and debate.  Now, I’m the opposite.  I’d rather let the other person win; however, when our debates center on those of a literary or vernacular nature, I hang on like a bull dog, tenacious until my husband taps out or because I genuinely win. 

Take for example our last debate over the use of the word “soiled”.  We were leaving the gym, and Chad stated that he needed to wash his ball cap because it was soiled.  I should have known better.  I should have bitten my tongue.  I should have let him believe himself correct.  But, alas, I couldn’t do it.  So began our debate. 

My take:  the word soiled, even though it means to make dirty or filthy, is generally used in reference to something coming in contact with poo.  For instance, if someone states they soiled his/her pants, people would assume he/she didn’t make it to the bathroom on time.  So, I, being the good wife, explained to my husband that he might not want to go around stating that he soiled his hat. 

Chad’s take:  why bend to the pressure of society?  Is this really what we’ve come to?  Forsaking a historical definition all for the sake of public scrutiny?  Who cares if someone thinks I messed in my hat?  They are only showing their ignorance if they truly think I “shat” in my hat! 

So, here is where I need you, dear reader.  I would love your take on the word “soiled”.  Is it to be only used when dealing with excrement?  Or is it okay to use when describing anything dirty or filthy?  I won’t lie to you … I hope I’ll get enough support so I can perform the proverbially “see-I-told-you-so” dance.  If, however, you agree with my husband, I will accept my defeat in a lady-like fashion and “tap out”.  

© 2017 by Jessica Berg